Unholy Fear and the Frustration of Faith, Part Two

There are healthy fears: first and foremost, what the Bible calls “fear of the Lord.” This is more than reverence; it is a deeply experienced, holy awe. It is what moved Moses to cover his face before approaching the burning bush (cf. Exodus 3:6). It is the recognition of God’s glory, and corresponds with an awareness of our smallness, and that of all creation, before such majesty. This fear acknowledges the total dependence of the creature upon the Creator. It leads one to contemplate the divine love that wishes only good for such unworthy creatures, and the astounding beauty and goodness of such a Love.

Then there are normal, human fears, such as the alarm one might experience when threatened by fire, or the fear that rises in one when approached in a dark alley by a man wearing a sinister grin and wielding a baseball bat.

But then there is Unholy Fear, which, to my mind, is a disordered fear. We experience it when we give to something that is not God the reverence due only to God. This is a form of idolatry. For instance, when I become obsessively worried over financial security, it is good to ask myself if I have made an idol of security. Or if I fear losing my spouse so much that I break the commandments in order to sustain a certain lifestyle she feels entitled to (such as stealing from my employer in order to provide an affluent lifestyle to suit her tastes), I have made an idol of my relationship with her, which is what I fear is threatened if I don’t provide for her desires.

Unholy fears are an impediment to faithfulness. It is, to use an all too common example, unholy fear that leads married couples to use contraception. They fear (I speak from my own pre-Catholic experience, and from conversations with others who admit they are too afraid to be faithful to God in the Church's teaching on openness to life) lack of control in their lives. They fear giving God full reign (I believe it is at the root the same as the sin of Adam and Eve, the desire to control one’s own life and destiny, to be morally autonomous).

There have been times I have let unholy fear prevent me exercising boldly authentic love. In the past, this fear has led me at worst to choose grave evil, and at other times, perhaps less dramatically, to fail in exercising heroic charity. Be it my lack of patience and kindness in dealing with teenager troubles at home, or my not taking God-given opportunities to do good things for my family, there have been many times I have allowed unholy fear to dominate me. 

When my first priority is to “fear the Lord,” to worship Him with my entire life, to serve him wholeheartedly, I find that I am free of fear. “Perfect love casts out all fear. (1 John 4:18)”

When I strive to seek His will in all things, the big things and the little things, something amazing seems to happen. “Let my heart’s one aim to be to fear your name. (Psalm 86:11)” I find that life just falls into place. I experience joy. “Rejoicing in the Lord will be your strength. (Nehemiah 8:10)”

Unholy fear undermines our efforts to fulfill our primary task, a task that we are reminded of by the priest at dismissal at Mass. In one of the options for the Concluding Rites, the priest says, “Go in peace, glorifying the Lord by your life.” 

When I allow unholy fear to dominate me, I frustrate the work of the Holy Spirit in me. I fail to glorify the Lord with my life when I hide in the shadows of fear. When I put God before all else, when I allow His love to move in my life, I am able to live and love boldly.

Mary, Our Lady of Joy, pray for us!